Digging Up the Roots

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Dec 31, 2021 23:30:18 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Dec 31, 2021 23:30:18 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]
The interior of the black car was quiet as it nestled itself into a parking space at Hope’s Garden. Normally it would be overflowing with loud music, the driver and sole occupant causing irreparable damage to her ears as she screamed along to the music. Today, however, the radio was off, with no noise filling the space save for the hum of the engine. As she turned the key, that too, quieted, leaving Lily to sit in silence. She made no move to exit the car, her eyes still staring straight ahead. She didn’t want to do this. She didn’t have to. She could just drive away, call back, apologize profusely and reschedule. Again. For the third time. Lily let out a long sigh as her forehead settled against the steering wheel.

What are you so worried about? It’s just gonna be some old guy having you lay on a couch, asking you how you feel. You can bullshit this, have him say there’s nothing wrong with you, and be out in 30.

That part of Lily’s brain had been pestering her the whole way here. It’s what had caused her to cancel the past two appointments. The idea that nothing was wrong with her, that she was making a big deal out of it, that since nobody was telling her something was wrong meant she was fine. True, she didn’t have friends pestering her to go seek therapy, but her recent slip-ups had shaken her far more than they would if she was fine. With a groan she pulled herself up, checking her phone to make sure she hadn’t missed her appointment. Unfortunately, she hadn’t.

Fuck it.

Before she could think any more about it, Lily pushed open her door and quickly exited her car, pulling the dark blue bomber jacket closer around her, hoping the thought of its previous owner would help keep her from getting back in the car and driving away. A quick walk later and she was inside the brightly lit, yet still somewhat cozy space. She walked up to the reception desk, speaking much more reservedly than anyone would have expected from her .

“Hi, I’m Lily Pond. I have an appointment with Dr. Holt for 2pm.”

Alvis
Member

Posts: 136

Digging Up the Roots Jan 2, 2022 0:18:22 GMT

Post by Alvis on Jan 2, 2022 0:18:22 GMT

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/CCKnG4A.png);background-size:cover;background-attachment:fixed"]

[attr="style","height:30px;"]

[attr="style","color:#732331;font-size:180%;font-family:'Megrim',sans-serif;text-align:left;display:inline;float:left;"]Hope's Garden, Alvis's Office

[attr="style","display:inline;color:transparent"]...

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/Is0zbpL.png);background-position:center center;background-repeat:repeat-x; float: none;overflow: hidden;height:100%;"]

It had been a busy day. A very busy day indeed. It was hard not to let fatigue show sometimes. Having been clocked in since seven that morning and having several sessions run overtime meant that Alvis was running on fairly low energy at the moment, and the fact that he was nearing the time for his once-monthly night of restorative sleep didn't help matters either. Still, he didn't let that get in the way of his work, and he certainly didn't let it get in the way of his patients. No, his patients thought he was alert as ever- the only people who knew otherwise were the few who passed him in the break room and had to snap his attention away from the window into the garden.

Ah, the garden. It was looking a little barren, as it often did in the wintertime, but it was laid out in such a way that its barrenness was barely noticeable. Alvis had specifically chosen raised flowerbeds, decorations, and other little features that were pleasant enough to look at when the plants had died down for winter, but didn't distract from them when they were in full bloom during the warmer months. He had a knack for things like that. After all, the man was an artist in his spare time, and he had always treated gardening as an extension of that- a reflection of the self through plants and wood. Perhaps it made sense that, today, it looked a little tired.

He had a patient now, last one of the day. Lily Pond, as the file called her, had not given much information outright, but her multiple cancellations of the session told Alvis at least a little about what kind of person he was dealing with here. So, when he heard the receptionist call for him, he stepped out into the hallway where they could both see him. He didn't want her stressing about being lost, after all.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Miss Pond?"

He asked,

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"My office is just this way. Do come in."

Icon source.
Character bio.

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Jan 4, 2022 16:33:55 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Jan 4, 2022 16:33:55 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]Lily waited patiently, the only person in the waiting room. The whole area had been made relatively warm and welcoming, but she still sat awkwardly in the chair, back straight as a ramrod. Her fingers tapped along her thigh, a tune that only she could hear. She almosted wanted to start pacing, but the receptionist had already given her a weird look when she checked in. So she sat, nervously tapping her fingers, until she heard a voice call her name. Not verbally, but mentally. She jumped a bit as the intrusion into her mind, but quickly tried to play it off as she saw the figure enter the hall, a rather unassuming grey-haired man, most likely Dr. Holt. After all, how many people knew she was coming who could speak into her mind?

Lily responded with a nod and stood up, crossing the room a bit faster than necessary before following Alvis into his office. It, like the rest of the spaces she’d seen, seemed designed to relax the patient. However, it did nothing to ease Lily’s nerves. She sat in the corner of the couch, posture still far straighter than she was, waiting until the door was closed before she began speaking with Alvis.

“Sorry about canceling a lot. Cold feet, heh. Also, everything is confidential, right? First time seeing someone like this.” She rubbed the back of her head awkwardly. “Also, like is it better if I talk out loud or should I think stuff at you?”

Alvis
Member

Posts: 136

Digging Up the Roots Jan 4, 2022 23:11:22 GMT

Post by Alvis on Jan 4, 2022 23:11:22 GMT

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/CCKnG4A.png);background-size:cover;background-attachment:fixed"]

People often asked if Alvis would rather have them speak through their thoughts. Hell, some people didn't ask at all and just assumed they should, so he usually took their silence as a cue to take a cursory glance at what they were thinking to see if they were trying to talk that way. In truth, he preferred it when people spoke out loud. It usually made them feel a bit more comfortable, anyway, and patient comfort was a high priority.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Speak however you like."

He smiled,

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"And, if you want to change how you speak, then that's fine as well. Some people find certain things a lot harder to say out loud."

The matter of privacy came up- one which Alvis understood quite well. Patient confidentiality was, quite famously, something he never, ever breached, much to the chagrin of any organisations wanting information on a criminal patient.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Yes, everything is confidential. I do write physical records, but if you'd rather I didn't, then I can just make mental notes of things instead, okay?"

He sat down at his chair.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"So, what brings you here, Lily?"

Last Edit: Jan 5, 2022 11:30:05 GMT by Reyn

Icon source.
Character bio.

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Jan 7, 2022 14:44:34 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Jan 7, 2022 14:44:34 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]“I’d prefer mental notes, thank you.” Politeness was unusual for Lily, but she figured she should probably be polite to the person she was about to spill her fucking guts to. She took a deep breath, held it for a moment, let it out, and began.

“I’m trying to move past something. A while back, I was younger, stupider. I did vigilante shit, knocked people around, raised hell, that kinda stuff. There was a group I idolized, one that claimed to be for the people, give everyone powers, that sorta thing.”

She needed to move, Lily stood up and began pacing around Dr. Holt’s small space, not even looking at him anymore.

“I found them, I joined them. I dragged my girlfriend with me, and she joined too. Now they’re gone, all of them. Her too. And I’m just trying to figure out what to do next.”

Lily’s words came out stilted and oddly paced, as if she was constantly trying to find the right words, dancing around the topic. And perhaps she was. After all, she didn’t want to start the session with massive amounts of trauma. Gotta work up to that shit. She kept pacing, going from one end of the room to the other, keeping an ear out for Dr. Holt’s reactions and response.

Alvis
Member

Posts: 136

Digging Up the Roots Jan 8, 2022 21:32:56 GMT

Post by Alvis on Jan 8, 2022 21:32:56 GMT

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/CCKnG4A.png);background-size:cover;background-attachment:fixed"]

So, she wanted to move past something she did in her youth, hm? Alvis knew that feeling. He knew it well. He, therefore, understood her agitation as she stood up to pace around his office whilst she spoke. He understood the pacing, and the vagueness of her words, and the stilted, unnatural tone in which she said them. His response, when observed, would likely be what Lily was hoping for- quietly and intently listening to all that was being said whilst keeping a watchful, but not scrutinising eye on her as she moved.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"I see."

He shifted his posture slightly. Alvis could start by asking several probing questions about this particular group, but he quickly realised that would only serve to sate his own curiosity- it wasn't entirely in the interest of the patient. Not yet, anyway. Discussing the group would likely come later.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Well, I'm sorry you had to go through that. I... suppose that goes without saying."

He offered a sympathetic smile,

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Now, I could sit here and give you a rather clinical list of steps to take to improve your situation, but I don't think that will get us very far on its own. From what I've heard, I think discussing your past and yourr history with this group would be beneficial- if you're willing to bring it up, of course. I'm not going to rush you here, by any means, but I think I might need some context before I can start offering ways to help, is that alright? We don't have to talk about it right away- we don't have to talk at all, if you find it hard to speak of these things out loud. You could always just..."

He pointed to his head, though he seemed a little embarrassed by the obvious gesture.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Well, you could just think what you want me to know, if that makes it easier."

Icon source.
Character bio.

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Jan 14, 2022 20:30:30 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Jan 14, 2022 20:30:30 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]Lily had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep herself from lashing out at Alvis when he made his original comment. Typical fucking psych, ‘oh I see’. She wasn’t angry at him, there was just a lot of emotion and it wanted to go somewhere. As he offered solutions she stopped pacing, instead moving to perch on the arm of the couch, feet dangling.

“No, if I think about it, there’s deniability. I need to say it out loud.” By this point a translucent blue dagger had appeared in Lily’s hand and she began tossing it into the air, end over end, catching it as it came back down. Her eyes slid out of focus, staring past the blade, past Alvis. Toss, catch, toss, catch.

“Several months ago, I did vigilante shit. Y’know, small-time criminals, give them some percussive justice, that was that.” A faint smile crossed her lips as she remembered simpler days, simpler times, when all it took to be a hero in her mind was kneecapping someone robbing a 7/11. “I hung around online a lot, checking forums, surfing the web. Eventually heard of a group that wanted to make the world better, that wanted to stop putting heroes on pedestals, to give powers to everyday people, let them fend for themselves instead of relying on the big name heroes who were too busy dealing with planetary destruction than to be worried about a small neighborhood in danger.”

It hadn’t been easy finding out about them at first. Just random talk about them on the internet, chat rooms devoted to trying to find the group, their members, to see if they were real or just a myth. It was embarrassing how many hours she’d put away online talking about them.

“I was in a main chat devoted to them, finding news stories, connecting the dots. Eventually, someone joined and proved they were part of the group. Gave a time and a place.” Lily drew in a breath, the knife ceased flipping. “So when the Lotus hijacked the train, I made sure my girlfriend and I were on it. I thought I was doing something good for both of us. She wanted more power than to just make pretty lights, I wanted to join. I made my way through the train, fought a handful of members, and by the end of it, we left with the rest of the Lotus.” Lily’s gaze was still ahead, eyes still unfocused, her mind going through that fateful day.

Alvis
Member

Posts: 136

Digging Up the Roots Jan 16, 2022 23:45:49 GMT

Post by Alvis on Jan 16, 2022 23:45:49 GMT

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/CCKnG4A.png);background-size:cover;background-attachment:fixed"]

The Lotus. Alvis knew the name. He didn't know much else, however, but that seemed more like a blessing than a curse. Their reputation preceded them- and, from the view of someone who worked in trauma counselling, that was not a good thing. If Lily was involved with them, then it went without saying that she needed help. Still, he hadn't got the full story yet. Alvis crossed his legs over each other and leaned forward in the chair, making a slight gesture towards her.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Continue."

Icon source.
Character bio.

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Jan 23, 2022 2:49:51 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Jan 23, 2022 2:49:51 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]The knife continued spiraling through the air as Lily barely registered Alvis’s reaction, her mind still wading through the ocean of shit she had to let out. If the good doctor had any adverse reaction to the knife, he certainly didn’t make it known. Perhaps he had patients flipping knives all the time in his office. That would be a riot. Lily chuckled to herself at the thought before seriousness brought her back.

“So they brought me in, trained me up. I was already good at fighting, they just improved what was already there. Stealth, infiltration, information gathering. I didn’t mind, I was just happy to be a part of it.” The knife stopped for a moment, caught in her hand. “Then Vegas happened.” God, Lily didn’t know how long it’d been since that night. She still remembered it though, clear as if it was yesterday.

“The Lotus had decided to step up operations a bit, so they planned to go after the mayor of Las Vegas, get a foothold into legitimacy.” Lily’s voice sounded hollow. She’d known it was for illegal operations, or at least she’d suspected. But as long as she’d had that plausible deniability, she had no problem with it. “We were successful. I killed her. Ran her through as we were falling through the sky.” The pain from her duplicate’s impact was seared into her brain. But hey, not many people could say they knew how it felt to shatter your bones on impact from several stories up.

“Then things went quiet, we went dark for a bit. When you do something that public, doesn’t make shit easier, y’know? Eventually my mentor was found, arrested, put on trial for dozens of crimes. They had me watching, keeping an eye on the prison every night to ensure that if she ever made an escape that she’d have help to return to the Lotus.” Lily backtracked. “Well, they just needed someone there. I volunteered for most of it.”

The flipping resumed, the hands slightly shaky as Lily took a moment before she continued her story. Tears began to form in the corners of her eyes as Lily’s voice caught. “Then came the order. Just three words. ‘Put her down’. She was no longer a Lotus, no longer family. Just a rabid dog. So I went into the prison. I asked her why she betrayed us. And I finished the job.”

The knife spiraled up, then back down, but the hand made no move to catch it. The blade sliced into Lily’s index finger before falling to the floor, dissipating before impact. Lily had no reaction to the fresh wound, simply staring ahead as the blood began to well up, threatening to spill onto Alvis’s carpet.

“I killed my mentor. The Lotus went underground. They thanked me, set me up with money and school, and left. I did their dirty work and they threw me away.” Lily’s voice trembled as she fought to hold back emotions that had long since been thought locked away, emotions that she had forgotten were there. Tears threatened to spill over as the blood in her cut did, crimson dripping onto the floor of Alvis’s office.

Alvis
Member

Posts: 136

Digging Up the Roots Jan 27, 2022 14:48:10 GMT

Post by Alvis on Jan 27, 2022 14:48:10 GMT

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/CCKnG4A.png);background-size:cover;background-attachment:fixed"]

Alvis nodded as she spoke, listening to everything she had to say, though none of it surprised him in the slightest. The Lotus were a faceless group of monsters, and he had no doubt that Lily's story was far from the only one of its kind. Of course, that didn't make it any less hurtful- if anything, it made it more so. He wasn't going to tell her that. It would likely make things worse, knowing that other people suffered the same fate. Besides, she probably knew that already. They needed to focus on her.

Which, at the moment, involved sorting out that wound.

Perhaps unwisely, Alvis had waited for Lily to be finished before interrupting. As soon as the blade had cut her finger, he began to reach around the back of the desk for the first aid kit, but he didn't say anything until she had stopped talking. Now, he stood up and walked towards her, getting a sterile bandage out from the kit, along with some disinfectant.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Right, I see. Right."

He said, sounding a little distracted,

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"I'm sorry about all of that. I'm sorry about this- I need to treat that wound before we continue, is that alright?"

The inscrutable calm that was usually present on his face was almost completely gone by now. He looked worried- the wound wasn't deep, but it was still a wound nonetheless. Ah, he should've told her not to throw that knife, shouldn't he? How did he miss something like that? Was his exhaustion finally catching up to him- now, of all times? He was with a patient, one who had just told him a lifetime of deep, personal trauma, he couldn't let his professionalism slip now, could he?

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"This might sting a bit. I'm sorry."

He would then attempt to disinfect the wound, offering an uneasy smile in an attempt to reassure Lily. He just needed to get this done, he thought. Once the wound was taken care of, the rest of this session should go well. He just needed to get over this first.

Icon source.
Character bio.

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Feb 13, 2022 5:38:22 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Feb 13, 2022 5:38:22 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]If Lily heard Alvis’s offer to treat her wound, she didn’t react. Wherever she was, it certainly wasn’t here. As he inspected her hand, looking at the wound, he would notice similar scars along her fingers and hands. Where her jacket sleeve had caught and pushed up slightly, he could see the edges of more long-healed wounds. They didn’t appear self-inflicted, moreso the type of scars that would appear if one handled blades without much care, or perhaps trained with live blades, regardless of the risk.

As he applied the disinfectant, the sudden sting of pain brought Lily out of her trance. She let out a hiss of pain, yanking back her hand as she blinked her tears away. “Relax, dude, it’s fine.” For a moment her casual conversation returned, forgetting she was in a doctor’s office. “Shit, I mean. It’s nothing, it’s fine. Nothing I haven’t handled before.” Lily glanced down, noticing the crimson spot on his floor. “Shit, sorry about that. Shouldn’t have been throwing the knife to be honest.” She gave Alvis her hand again and let him finish treating her cut.

“Just a sort of reflex to be honest. I know it sounds dumb, but with weapons you know where the danger is, it’s on the sharp edge. As long as you know where the sharp edge is, and keep it away from you, you’ll be fine.” She sighed, her head dropping slightly in defeat. “You don’t always know where the sharp edge is with people. Or with yourself.”

Alvis
Member

Posts: 136

Digging Up the Roots Mar 3, 2022 17:36:05 GMT

Post by Alvis on Mar 3, 2022 17:36:05 GMT

[attr="style","background-image:url(https://i.imgur.com/CCKnG4A.png);background-size:cover;background-attachment:fixed"]

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"You don't need to apologise to me, Lily."

Alvis said,

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"In all honesty, I shouldn't have let you do that to yourself. I should've tried to stop you. I'm sorry."

He took out a sterile bandage and began wrapping it around the wound.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Still, there's nothing we can do about that anymore. The wound has already been made- all we can do now is dress it and wait for it to heal."

It was, admittedly, quite cliche to bring up the topic in such a manner, but Alvis couldn't really help himself- the metaphor had landed right in his lap. He checked over the wound once more to see if it was properly dressed, before standing up and returning to his seat, placing the first-aid kid behind the chair.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"You know, just because something has a sharp edge, that doesn't mean it's necessarily going to cut you."

Alvis sighed.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Yes, everyone has the capacity for violence, but... well, you don't need me to tell you what the world would be like if everyone decided to act on that capacity. It's hard to trust again, I know, but you're not going to get through this alone. That's why you're talking to me, isn't it?"

He offered a wary smile.

[attr="style","opacity:50%;display:inline"]"Do you have many friends at the moment, Lily? Do you have a good support network?"

Icon source.
Character bio.

Lily Pond
New Member

Posts: 37

Digging Up the Roots Mar 14, 2022 19:55:29 GMT

Post by Lily Pond on Mar 14, 2022 19:55:29 GMT

[attr="style","border:#D4AF37 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","background-color:#001C44;"]

[attr="style","padding:5px;"]

[attr="style","border:#C0C0C0 3px solid;"]

[attr="style","padding:10px;"]

[attr="style","font-family:gabriola;"]

[attr="style","font-size:20px;"]

[attr="style","color:#C0C0C0;"]As Alvis finished treating her wound and retreated, Lily habitually summoned the knife again before sheepishly dissipating it. Instead, she conjured a small, thin stick and began twirling it mindlessly between her fingers. No edge, no pain. Well, she could still hit someone with it. Might hurt a little, but not a ton. Wait shit, Alvis was talking to her. Lily turned her attention back to the therapist who she’d asked for help. He’s right, I’ve at least figured that a problem exists, and that you can’t do it alone. Lily sighed, the twirling stick disappearing as she clasped her hands together.

“Friends? Sorta. Support network? Hell, I am the support network.” Lily’s mind flashed, once again, to the Lotus. They’d been her friends, Kira had been her support. Who did she have now? Lark and Cassidy, maybe. But they seemed to call her for help, she didn’t want to do it the other way around. Cassidy always seemed like he was dying, and Lark always looked like it. No, she didn’t want to bother them.

“The few people I consider friends have plenty of issues without me piling my old shit on them. I’ll work this out, I just have to be stronger.” Always stronger, always pushing herself. She just needed a little more and she could handle this, just like she always had.